StTwitter - TWITTER VIRGINS #EffOff

@StTweetersTrust #StTwitters

THE EFFICIENCY OFFICE #EffOff 

IN HOUSE

TRAINING PROGRAMME FOR ST TWITTERS STAFF

"TWITTER VIRGINS"

LETS HAVE THE 

"TWITTER VIRGINS" 

UP TO SPEED 

Check Out

#WeNurses @Wenurses

Affiliated and Accredited Training Programmes

TWITTER UNIVERSITY

YOUR VERY OWN VIRTUAL UNIVERSITY

THE ST TWITTERS INSTITUTE

The #StTwitters Hospital Bar

@StTweeterTrust #StTwitters

THE HOSPITAL BAR

#EffOff Unsure whether its good for morale or bad for image

C/O The Bar Tenders

@PhillipRBall @NRCUK 

 Exceptional Thanks to @NRCUK for the Brilliant Homely Refurbishment of the

#StTwitters STAFF BAR   

AND THE INSPIRATIONAL @PhillipRBall 

Highlighting EMERGENCY EMPTIES

@StTwitters Responds with the NHS Virtual Solution 

(NICE Recommended - Allegedly) 

David @EtonOldBoys Orders a GNT from a surprised #StTwitters Staff Nurse

The "What Would Florence Do" Research Institute #StTwitters

@StTweetersTrust

#EffOff Proudly Presents the New #StTwitters

"What Would Florence Do" (#WWFD) Research Institute

Lead by Research Nurse Sr N Quisitive @LynneStobbart 

And 

Research Student Sn Ninja @NinnjaNurse 

THE WELFARE OF OUR PATIENTS IS AT STAKE

#StTwitters - Finding the Evidence that Supports our Traditions

"Este Paratus" - Be Prepared

Impending Hospital Inspection

@StTweetersTrust #StTwitters

#EffOff The Efficiency Office Announces

THE HOSPITAL INSPECTORATE ARE COMING  

Este Paratus - BE PREPARED 

The nurses were concerned with matron's zeal to start weekend ward cleaning

News of the impending hospital inspection including scrutiny of the pharmacy was all too much for Mr Asprin @LondonWorms

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Matron is a little puzzled and suspicious over the credentials of the

INSPECTORATE PANEL

?? Clueless - No Idea - Posh Boys - Silly Targets -  Privatisation - Profit

Dai Camoron @EtonOldBoys

@Jeremey_Twunt

Eddy Millibrain

La La Lansley

Nicky (Trust Me - Uni Fees) Claggy 

AND #StTwitters VERY OWN

Service Inspector  @alans1stwife #StTwitters "Impartial Allie"  

RALLY THE STAFF

TIDY THE BEDS

TIDY THE SLUICE

INSTRUCT THE PATIENTS

THE SAFETY OF OUR PATIENTS IS AT STAKE !!!

AND 

"Carry that Bedpan to Glory"

The Cultural Ambassador & WhistleBlower

@StTweetersTrust #StTwitters #EffOff

We are pleased to Welcome

THE NEW

The Cultural Ambassador & Official WhistleBlower @maxwele2 

Ambassador = A diplomatic official of the highest rank appointed and accredited as representative in residence by one government or sovereign to another

WhistleBlower = One who reveals wrongdoing within an organization to the public or to those in positions of authority

Politics = "Is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedies." Groucho Marx 

How to Behave in Hospital

@StTweetersTrust #StTwitters #EffOff

HOW TO BEHAVE IN HOSPITAL

SIster Angela Plumes

Annual Priority Address & Agenda 

for 

Patients & their Families

No Drinking

No Swearing

And Definitely

No charging mobile phones off plugs in A&E

C/O @Lillithsusili

St Twitters Pets as Therapy (PATS) Services

@StTweetersTrust #StTwitters

PETS AS THERAPY SERVICES

Coordinated by @Acorns47 - aka Kim Peanuts 

We Need Your Pets for Our Patients 

Your Pictures Please

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The PATS Team Gears up for Xmas

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SHOCK - HORROR
RSPCA To Investigate Pets As Therapy
As Dog Collapses from "Over-Petting"

C/O @Londonworms
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C/O @Londonworms

Smokey C/O @Pixiegirle

The Chooks C/O @AnnieCoops

 Barney C/O @GreyRockNews

Molly & Walnut C/O @Bunzbird 

Rufus C/O @Bartontd

C/O @CowBagLil  

C/O @CowBagLil 

C/O @CowBagLil 

@StTweetersTrust #StTwitters

HOSPITAL TRANSPORT

In the light of urgent Austerity Measures required by the St Twitters Efficiency Office... #EffOff has acted on the suggestion of @amnerisuk @dawnmidwife @DtBarron in the introduction of a new streamlined Hospital Staff Shuttle Service and State of the Art Ambulance Fleet. 

@Jeremy_Twunt Approves - Good Plan