INTERNATIONAL NURSES DAY

INTERNATIONAL NURSES DAY

2014 - Well that was hectic 

Impressions a Staggering 1 Million

482 Tweets

82 Participants 

SEE THE CHAT DATA

You Dusted off your Memories

SO MUCH TO REMEMBER

PATIENTS, STAFF, RULES, UNIFORMS

 THINGS WE DID, THINGS WE DIDN'T DO

TEARS, LAUGHTER, INSPIRATIONS

NURSING - DEFINES US

"You Did Remember"

SEE THE CHAT TRANSCRIPT

St Twitters / Twitter Chat

MOVE OVER @Wenurses
#StTwitters is Taking Charge

MONDAY MAY 12TH 2014

9pm - 10pm

Guaranteed Anarchy 

TWITTER CHAT

REMEMBER #REMEMBER 

A TRIP DOWN A NURSING MEMORY LANE

CHAT = USE HashTag

#StTwitters

DO YOU REMEMBER

Magnesium Sulphate

Kaolin poultice to draw "it" out

Egg white & Oxygen anyone?

Opium tincture.

And let's not forget EUSOL?!

Edinburgh University Solution Of Lime

MILTONs ! ... for sterilising?

Savilon

Wounds - Hydrogen peroxide!!!

Gentian stained fingers?

Soaked gauze ribbon in it to pack wounds.

Salt baths pre and post Op?

And full shave - for just about anything!

Nipples to knees / ankles

Nelsons inhaler with boiling water & friars balsam

Paraffin tulle impregnated with honey?

Elastoplast & Sleek on skin

A life before gloves

Chlorhexidine  in Magenta 

Dressing procedures with forceps prowess

The 'Back' Trolley

Many Tailed Bandages

Take the Basket to the Linen - Not the Linen to the Basket

Drapolene

The Visiting Hours BELL

Gets buckle out, gives it a polish

Steam sterilisers ?

Cidex

Patients #OT - bandage rolling in the afternoon

Shiny bedpans

Pillow Case opening away from the Ward Entrance

Cooked Breakfasts for Patients

Folding back the top sheet = The fold back - length from elbow to finger tips

45 Degree Bed Corners

Post Op Beds

Windows we could open wide to the germs out

Full Canteen Service at Night for Night Staff

The Horlicks Gadget 

Prescribed Sherry, Whisky and Guinness on the Drug Trolley

Old beds tall head/foot boards & rails under bed

Bed Wheels all lined up in the same direction

Beds like a huge cot!

Silastic Foam

Sleak

Test Tubes and Bunsen Burners for Urinalysis

Milking Chest Drains

WHAT DO YOU REMEMBER 

ABOUT NURSING

LETS TALK ON ABOUT IT

INTERNATIONAL NURSES DAY

USE #StTwitters

THE WELFARE OF OUR PATIENTS IS AT STAKE

ALL #STTWITTERS STAFF WILL BE EXPECTED TO BE "ON DUTY" - MATRON HAS SPOKEN

BTW

#StTwitters Needs New Staff

APPLICATIONS - Contact

@BartonTD

St Twitters New Career Structure

Matron Announces the New St Twitters Career Framework

After extensive Consultation

The New St Twitters Career Framework replaces the witheringly dated KSF

Staff are rated on a simple 4 point Scale 

 Point 1: A JUNIOR MEMBER OF THE JUNIOR STAFF

POINT 2: A SENIOR MEMBER OF THE JUNIOR STAFF

POINT 3: A JUNIOR MEMBER OF THE SENIOR STAFF

POINT 4: A SENIOR MEMBER OF THE SENIOR STAFF

No more KSF Confusion

Where are you in the St Twitters Career Structure 

THE WELFARE OF OUR PATIENTS IS AT STAKE

Matrons 4 Point State of StTwitters 4 Point Statement

Matrons 4 Point State of StTwitters Statement

At this time of year, in that moment between the Festivities of Yuletide & New Year and the arrival of Spring

I Reflect

The days are dark, the weather inclement, and the Politicians and Hospital Managers are (as always) inept

And it is clear that our colleagues at the #NursingTimes need to change their Communist attitudes to respond to the crisis that we (Nurses) face in 2014.

At St Twitters it is my charge to see my devoted team of Nurses as well disciplined, neat, ordered, busy and appropriately subservient to our Medical Masters. 

What is clear to me is that we are, as Nurses, are at a cross roads.

In the Year Ahead we have a mission - and I challenge you with the following 4 Point Plan :

Firstly - we must challenge the upstarts at the so called Nursing and Midwifery Council (NMC) who are constantly bringing our noble profession into disrepute with their constant ill-informed prattling. It is clear that this self appointed government committee quango is comprised of a group of left wing vegetarians who have as much understanding of Profession and Discipline of Nursing as a 1st Year introductory Nurse.  Revalidation? Do they not understand that the proper Nurse is steeped in a tradition, in the rituals of our noble profession that have been tried and tested over generations. I will NOT tolerate my Nurses being exposed to so called modern new fangled and quite frankly silly testing of the profound skills handed down from generation to generation of nurses - how dare they!

May I suggest that these quasi 'manager' nurses who purport to "advise" our noble profession report to Nest Ward at St Twitters, in appropriate Uniform, and undertake a more testing busy shift on Bottle Round and Sluice Duty. This will SURELY restore a sense of the fundamentals of nursing in practice and brush away this propensity for constant irrelevant bureaucracy and paper work.

Secondly - the so called Royal College of Nursing and its atrocious promotion of MEN in Nursing. I can only be amazed the organisation that regulates our beloved profession still promotes the inclusion of the male species to our ranks. If I may quote my spiritual leader and moral compass - Sister Angela Plume - the Patron Saint of St Twitters:

 "Men in Nursing! Does not the very phrase, this palpable contradiction in terms, strike you with its grotesquerie - and cry to heaven itself for correction."

If we are prevent our beloved profession of Nursing from sinking into the mire of political correction and equality it is essential that we all insist on the immediate removal of all males from the noble identity of State Registered Nurse. Let them return to the ranks of Orderly's and Portering where they justly belong. It is Women, the gentle but dominant sex, who are the natural order, the bedrock, of our beloved Nursing Profession. 

Thirdly - we must stand steadfast against the ignorance of our so called political elite. The dullest of Introductory Block Nurses knows that Politicians have not the least glimmering of the needs of the patient, and more importantly the Hospital and its Wards, in delivering good Nursing Care. Away with them. It is time that our Hospitals were removed from the remorseless  bureaucracies of the Political Class, and placed safely into the hands of our Doctors and their Nurses who appreciate more fully the practice and customs of our proud traditions and Institutions.

Finally- we must stand united against the ludicrous interventions of the left wing radicals and usurpers, the so called educationalists, academics and researchers who seek to undermine the very foundations of our beloved Nursing Profession. Our proud traditions, our uniforms, our admiral subservience and discipline, at risk from this dangerous new socialist dogma. Away with them - we will not tolerate this at St Twitters.

At St Twitters we offer a vision for the future. A vision steeped in the traditions and lessons f the past

I humbly offer my plan for immediate implementation

Matrons 4 Point Plan for the NHS 
&

St Twitters

Meet the Hospital Chaplain - #StTwitters

Meet the Hospital Chaplain - #StTwitters 

St Twitters is delighted to note that

@RevDaveSouthall 

is part of the #StTwitters Team

HOSPITAL CHAPLAIN 

They are going to call him Rodney after Dave

THE WELFARE OF OUR PATIENTS IS AT STAKE

CARRY THAT BED PAN TO GLORY 

St Twitters celebrates Burns Night - Tae a Fart

#StTwitters - Burns Night

C/O @ShelaghAHP 

Tae a Fart

Oh whit a sleekit horrible beastie

Lurks in yer belly efter the feastie

Jist as ye sit doon among yer kin

There sterts tae stir an enormous win'

The neeps 'n' tatties 'n' mushy peas

Stert workin' like a gentle breeze

But soon the puddin' wi the sauncie face

Will hae ye blawin' a' ower the place

Nae maiter whit the hell ye dae

A'bodys gonnae hiv tae pay

Even if ye try tae stifle

It's like a bullet oot a rifle

Hawd yer bum ticht take the chair

Tae try an' stop the leakin' air

Shify yersel fae cheek tae cheek

Prae tae God it disnae reek

But aw yer efforts go assunder

Oot it comes like a clap o' thunder

Ricochets aroon the room

Michty me a sonic boom

God almighty it fairly reeks

Hope a hivnae s**t ma breeks

Tae the bog a better scurry

Aw whit the hell, it's no ma worry

A'body roon aboot me chokin

Wan or twa are nearly bokin

A'll feel better for a while

Cannae help but raise a smile

Wis him! A shout wi' accusin glower

Alas too late, he's jist keeled ower

Ye dirty bugger they shout and stare

A dinnae feel welcome ony mair

Where e'er ye be let yer wind gang free

Sounds like jist the job fur me

Whit a fuss at Rabbie's party

Ower the sake o' wan wee farty

 MATRON IS NOT AMUSED

Welcome to Project 1860

#StTwitters - BUT

FORGET 2014

Welcome to @StTweetersTrust #EffOff

Project 1860 

Inspired By

"NOTES ON NURSING"
What it is, and what it is not

BY

FLORENCE NIGHTINGALE

PREFACE.

"THE following notes are by no means intended as a rule of thought by which nurses can teach themselves to nurse, still less as a manual to teach nurses to nurse. They are meant simply to give hints for thought to women who have personal charge of the health of others." 

Matron and the Efficiency Office will be implementing "Project 1860" to ensure we return to the cherished values of "Basic & Fundamental" Nursing Care from the Victorian Golden Age.

"A tidy Ward is an efficient Ward. Ensure a major portion of the day is dedicated to correcting the disarray that patients cause."

"Of all the periods in the Hospital  Day, Visiting Time is one of the most pressured & least satisfactory for the busy Nurse."

"A major set back (for Nurses) came with the establishment of the National Health Service in 1948. Give people anything for nothing and they will cease to appreciate it. The NHS Act opened the floodgates to malingerers who had, until 1948, been held in check by decent Victorian values. Now any Tom, Dick or Harriet can march into a hospital, demanding free medical and nursing attention."

THE WELFARE OF OUR PATIENTS IS AT STAKE

Down with the Modernists

"I shall petition for proper nurses headgear, aprons & practical long skirts. I shall be relentless in my fight for lace cuffs"

"Nurse training should be an ideal rounding off to a young woman's education, providing a smooth transition from childhood to motherhood.

"Men in Nursing! Does not the very phrase, this palpable contradiction in terms, strike you with its grotesquerie - and cry to heaven itself for correction."

"The invidious take over of the Nursing Profession by those of the male sex can no longer be borne."

"We all have good reason to regret the extension in visiting hours foisted on us by misguided theorists."

In dealing with difficult relatives, as with difficult patients, a firm approach is absolutely essential. Believe me, attempts to reason with them will only be interpreted as weakness.

Project 1860 

A RETURN TO TRADITIONAL VALUES AT 

#STTWITTERS

And Never Forget the #ConDem NHS Motto

"Did you hear about the NHS Staff who died and went straight to hell? It was 2 weeks before they realised they weren't at work."

@BartonTD

#StTwitters Fans